The "Talking to People" Post

Ok, so it's been about a month since I've posted and I have regular access to internet! Hopefully this is not indicative of how I'm going to be keeping up with this blog in Lesotho! Now that I've gotten my invitation, I feel more comfortable speaking with people about what I'm doing the next few years. Being the age that I am people ask me what my future plans are on a regular basis. It seems that everyone is interested in what the young are going to do with their seemingly unlimited time on this Earth. Maybe when I'm that age I'll understand. For now, I find it intrusive but good table side conversation for my job as a server. When I tell people I'm leaving in October to serve in the Peace Corps people generally have one of six reactions:

1. Africa is no place for a young lady.

To which I reply: We have security guards and cultural training to keep us safe.

In my head I think: You dumbass. NOLA is just as dangerous.

 

2. Two years, that's a really long time.

To which I reply: Yes, you need that time to integrate into the culture and finish your projects

In my head I think: Why do people always think you can just go to a country spend a month there and make a lasting difference. That's called voluntourism and it's not effective.

 

3. Don't you want to get married, have children, get a good job?

To which I reply: Oh sure! But I have a lifetime in front of me and there is no better time to do something like this than right now.

In my head I think: And sell my soul to the devil for a two story house and a picket fence?

 

4. Peace Corps? That hippie mumbo, jumbo?

To which I reply: Yes sir, the Peace Corps is a commonly misunderstood organization. They are a group of professionals using applied skills to make a difference in the world's third world countries.

In my head I think: I. Can't. Even.

 

5. Won't you miss your family?

To which I reply: Yes, I will miss them very much. But they are supportive of what I do and proud no matter what so I know I will be in as constant communication as possible.

In my head I think: *sarcastic Nah, I hate my family. I'm running away to Africa so I never have to see them again. *sarcastic Dumbass.

 

6. Oh bless you, you're going to make such a difference and it'll be the greatest expereince of your life.

To which I reply: Thank you!! That is too kind.

In my head I think: Man you're sweet. But how do you know this will be the greatest experience of my life. Maybe one day I'll go to the moon. Maybe Peace Corps will suck and I'll get malaria. C'mon now!

 

 

But my favorite so far is, "How do you feel?". These only come around once in a blue moon. These are the people who are passing no judgement and are not acting like they know some great secret about the future. The simply want to hear how you're processing everything. These are the people I'm honest with. I take a deep breath and reply, "Well, if you want to know the truth... I'm losing my mind." They're the ones I share how stricken with guilt I am, all the anxiety of leaving my family and my boyfriend, how overwhelemed I am with medical tasks and my to-do lists. These are the people who deserve to peer into the mind of a FPCV.

 

Stone hut in Lesotho.

I can see Africa most days. Bright and shiny with open air. I know that it won't be like that. But on the days where I consider giving up on this roller coaster and settling into a normal life, those images keep me going. October is just around the corner and I've got to stay focused if I'm ever going to make it.